Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
This is the high leading the old right now
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
