Banned from zoo.
Again?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Randomize
