i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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