Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
