just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
