theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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