My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
