Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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