Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize
