I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
He did a backflip because drugs
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
