She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
