Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
