i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
