her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
