remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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