i need an iv and a liver transplant
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize