Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
