why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Randomize
