I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Randomize
