Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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