Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
