so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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