the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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