when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
