I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
