YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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