Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
