i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
