I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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