glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
