sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize