it's too hot outside to masturbate.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize