So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'm too high and old for this...
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize