when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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