I love black thongs
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
