Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
