So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
