i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
