I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
