Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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