My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
please don't ironically join a cult
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