he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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