i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
