so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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