This girl is more easily done than said...
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
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