Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
