***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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