I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
