remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Randomize
