I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
